INTRODUCTION
Romance in a relationship is the chord that makes the heart beat strongest. Without it, love can weaken and even disappear.
“101 Tips for Enhancing your Love Life” is a personal journey exploring the many faces of romantic love.
Differences exist between the sexes; we all know this to be true. Each living on a different planet, men and women have their own ideas about what is romantic.
What makes romance so powerful and so necessary to our life? Is it that romance is the language that only the heart knows best?
When we show the one we desire most that they are special to us, we are being romantic. We can do this in so many different and unique ways.
Any good relationship requires effort to keep it alive. Your unique way of being romantic is your personal anchor to securing the heart of another.
Romance the one you love with confidence! This ebook will be your personal guide!
THE FACE OF ROMANCE
You may be in a loving relationship, but, you don’t know the first thing about how to romance from the heart. Sure, you can say, “I love you,” just fine, but, all those wonderful, romantic ideas just seem to escape you.
Below you can take a page from a true romantic’s book. You can simply follow the guidance and do the do things, or, you can adapt the suggestions below to your own nature. Either way, you will be well on your way to being the true romantic!
A Week in the Life of a True Romantic
Day 1:
~ Leave a note professing your love for your partner to find during the day. Put the note where it will be found, easily. Try their briefcase, the driver's seat of their car, in their coat pocket, in their lunch bag, taped to the receiver of the phone, taped to their computer, or left taped to a doorknob.
~ As soon as you arrive home for the day seek out your partner and offer a big, loving kiss. Tell your partner how much you love him or her and ask about their day. Make this a new, daily habit.
~ As an alternate idea, when your partner arrives home for the day, take their hand and pull them towards you aggressively. Offer a huge hug, kiss and say, "I missed you today!”
Day 2:
~ While your partner showers, heat up his or her towel in the dryer.
~ Have flowers delivered to partner at work.
~ Surprise your partner by arriving home with their favorite drink, snack, or ice-cream.
Day 3:
~ Arrange for an intimate lunch date with your partner.
~ Afterward, send a virtual card. Tell them how much you enjoyed lunch together.
Day 4:
~ Call your partner in the middle of the day to discuss your romantic plans for that evening.
~ Print out some love coupons (find them on-line) and present them to your partner. One might say: this entitles loved one to a full-body massage, and sign your name.
Day 5:
~ For the kid in all of us! Use multi-colored, sidewalk chalk to draw a BIG heart in red and write. Print out the words, “I love you" in the middle of the heart. Do this someplace that is prominent such as on your driveway so that when your partner comes home he or she will see it.
~ Cook a favorite meal for your partner and then eat it, slowly, by candlelight.
Day 6:
~When the weather is best, take a brisk walk through a nature trail with your love and talk about all the reasons why he or she is so special to you.
~ If the weather is dreary, have an indoor picnic. Spend the time together, inside enjoying your favorite board games and just relaxing and talking.
~ Cuddle up in your pj’s and relish a romantic movie together.
Day 7:
~ Just sleep in and cuddle together. Call into work and explain you are “under the weather” and need to rest a bit more before coming in.
~ Make a long list of the many reasons why you love your partner as you do and then have them framed and present it to him or her.
~ If you don’t live together, call your loved one just to say goodnight. Recite a favorite love poem over the phone and end with, “Sweet dreams, until we meet again!”
LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT
"Should the sun refuse to shine, should romance run out of rhyme; you alone will hold my heart -- now until the very end of time.”
- Verses of Love
The biggest myth in romance is that you must pull off something big and extravagant so that your efforts will matter. The truth is that what will impress your loved one the most will often be the little things.
Little things are rather simple things that you do for your loved one. Despite the fact that they are "little" they can mean so much. Your loved one will be touched that you took the time to show him or her that you care so much. You will be considered thoughtful. All of this plays very well when wishing to be romantic.
Consider your loved one’s heart to be a basket. The basket wants to be filled. When you shower your loved one’s basket with many, little gifts, the basket will be filled and your loved one will be content and feel loved. It is as simple as that!
Considering the importance of every day little things, think about some new romantic ideas.
Just for today:
* Pay your loved one a compliment, such as how awesome they look.
* Give your loved one a strong hug just because.
* Pick a bouquet of wild flowers and present them with a kiss.
* Massage their back and/or feet at the end of a work week.
* Leave an "I love you" note on their pillow.
* Call spontaneously at their work to say “I am thinking about you.”
* Place your arm around your loved one in public.
Remember, when you take the time to be thoughtful and attentive today, this can usher in more intense romance later on.
PRIMARY COLORS OF ROMANCE
What is romance without a kiss?
When wishing for romance, your kisses had better be good to make a favorable impression. It may not be fair, but some will judge you on your first kiss as to whether or not they will want to see you again.
In other words, there needs to be good chemistry when kissing.
A good kiss delivers a powerful impact! If you're a great kisser, you're going to turn your date on and you will have a definite edge.
What distinguishes a good kisser from the kisser we all want to forget? The key is to be soft and gentle and follow their lead. Here are some good romantic kissing tips to enhance your love life:
STEP ONE
**Be careful not to startle - watch and wait for the signal to proceed
**Avoid the ‘ambush’ kiss (although these can be exciting as your relationship progresses.)
**Look deeply into your partner’s eyes. This will send the message that you like them and want to be closer to them. Look for their signals as well.
**Look for a warm, kind smile (even a slight smile is good; it doesn’t have to be BIG.)
**Pay attention to the look on your loved one’s face. This will indicate where they want to go with this kiss.
STEP TWO
**Look for good balance. As you move closer to that magical kiss, you don’t want to be leaning too forward awkwardly to get there.
**As you move closer you are sending signals. You want your body to be in a comfortable position during the kiss, so you can enjoy every moment of it.
**Go for a light touch just before the kiss. While a hand lightly on the face is a definite signal of intimacy, holding hands combined with eye contact and a warm look can indicate the beginning of a great kiss to come.
**Make sure you are aligned correctly at this point. This means not only getting your lips on track with theirs, but getting the head tilted correctly as well.
**Tilt your head slightly to one side first. Your partner will likely react and tilt the other way. This is a mutual sign that the kiss will be very welcomed.
STEP THREE
**Relax your lips, close your eyes.
**Move in slowly. During step number two you made sure the two of you were aligned correctly, now you can close your eyes as you’re just about to make contact.
**Relax your lips, not tightly pressed together. Give your partner the pleasant experience of feeling your lips softly against theirs.
**Your lips should be recently moistened, but not wet.
STEP FOUR
**Relax your lips, tilt your head and breathe evenly.
**Moving in, you can part your lips slightly just before contact. Keep your lips relaxed, your tongue in your mouth.
**Keep your head tilted so both of you can still breathe comfortably on contact and as the perfect kiss is held...
S A V O R every moment ... be slow, gentle, easy.
STEP FIVE
**Keep it sweet, not too long and not too wet.
**Don’t pull away too quickly or make any quick movements. Savor. Savor. Savor. Feel the power and romance of the kiss.
Enjoy the moment!
STEP SIX
**Take your time and don’t rush. Make eye contact, nonverbal and verbal messages.
**To end, pull away slowly and make eye contact again. Show a satisfied, warm smile to reinforce how you feel.
**Enjoy the closeness, relax, and finish the kiss with a warm embrace.
A few, thoughtful words, such as, “That was nice,” can be whispered. Try to reinforce how you felt about your kiss with positive words. Your partner will appreciate this and this can break the ice a little.
Now that you have mastered the romance of a kiss....you are well on your way to learn even more about how to enhance your romance life!
THE ROMANCE AND SCIENCE OF KISSING
What is that feeling people get from a good kiss that's so hard to explain? How does kissing come into play when being romantic?
Women often compare a good kiss to "melting butter" and like being "hit by a wave," according to a recent survey. Men often describe it as similar to "vibrations at a concert" or a "three pointer at the buzzer to win the NCAA basketball tournament," according to the same survey.
Experts have proven there is a lot of physiology behind the warm and fuzzy feelings that come from a good kiss.
Feelings of romantic love, and kissing, stimulate the same type of brain activity as many sports, such as: parachuting, bungee jumping and distance running, for example.
These same types of activities cause the brain to experience a surge in norepinephrine, dopamine and phenylethylamine (or just PEA to some.) These neurotransmitters attach to pleasure receptors in the brain and create feelings of euphoria, giddiness, elation and such.
So, next time you feel romantic and want to show your love to someone special, go for that wonderful kiss -- it will definitely leave a lasting impression!
A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. ~ Ingrid Bergman
ROMANCE FUNDAMENTALS -- PRIMARY FLIRTING
It is rather difficult to be romantic without first flirting. What exactly is flirting and how can you adapt some flirting into your own romantic moods and play? To begin, you don’t want to be too aggressive. Start with very friendly gestures and once you have gotten those moves down, and then go for the romantic flirting!
Flirting is a frame of mind:
Be self-confident and do not be afraid to take risks.
Be enthusiastic about romance and be positive!
Start a sexy conversation:
Start with a simple, opening line by saying hello.
Talk about anything at all, whatever will get the romance going.
Enjoy yourself and have fun:
Be playful, light-hearted and above all, be spontaneous.
Show that you can be vulnerable.
Make good use of all props:
Always use a prop.
Props will get the conversation started naturally. They encourage conversation and others will want to start talking to you.
Great props are: pets, children, great jewelry, a wonderful scent, a sweatshirt with your favorite sports team’s emblem, an interesting book or magazine.
Play host:
Take the lead by taking on the role of host.
Do not be the passive person in waiting, but rather the lead.
Introduce yourself first:
Move closer to the person you want to meet and introduce yourself confidently!
Listen-up:
Everyone loves to be heard and when you are a good listener your partner will be drawn to you.
Make bold eye contact:
Look your partner in the eye gently (no more than 2-4 seconds) and then look away. You don’t want to stare!
Pay a genuine compliment:
Your partner will be pleased and will warm up to you more.
Show a beautiful smile:
You will look so much more approachable. Everyone is attracted to a genuine and heartfelt, smile.
So there you go! These are all ground-breakers when wanting to approach someone with romance. We must always be mindful of the fundamentals.
When we just dive right in, unexpected, we can turn our loved one off. Go slow, a step at a time and feeling confident, approach with your best romance moves.
ENHANCE YOUR LOVE LIFE WITH A SPECIAL GIFT OF ROSES
Have you ever wished you could come up with a new gift idea to show your loved one how you feel?
Have you ever wondered about what the different colors of Roses actually mean? For instance, next time you choose a specific color of Rose, do so to convey a special meaning.
Look below and learn what the different Rose colors represent and next time you buy a Rose as a gift, deliver a loving message at the same time.
Colored Roses and What Each Color Means
Red - Love, I Love You
Pink - Perfect Happiness, Please Believe Me
Peach - Modesty
White - Innocence and Purity, I am Worthy of You, You're Heavenly
Orange - Fascination
Yellow - Texas Love, Joy and Friendship
Single Full Bloomed Rose - I Love You, I Still Love You
White and Red Mixed - Unity
Rosebud - Beauty and Youth, A Heart of Innocent Love
Rosebud (Red) - Pure and Lovely
Rosebud (White) - Girlhood
Bridal - Happy Love
Christmas - Tranquilize My Anxiety
Damask - Persian Ambassador of Love
Dark Crimson - Mourning or Loss
Hibiscus - Delicate Beauty
Leaf - You May Hope
Tea - I'll Remember Always
Thornless - Love at First Sight
Bouquet of Mature Blooms - Gratitude
Next time you buy your loved one a Rose as a gift, attach a handwritten card to convey the message to him/her that the color means. This is a great way to enhance your love life!
Here are some great examples for you to adapt for yourself:
Tea Rose -- Last night was very special. I’ll Remember Always!
Dark Crimson -- You mean so much to me. Can we try again just one more time?
Rosebud (Red) -- You take my breath away! You look so lovely!
Orange -- You fascinate me! Can we spend more time together?
Even smaller, simpler messages will enhance your love life and will thrill your partner!
GUIDE YOUR MAN TO TAKE THE ROMANTIC LEAD
Some men just aren’t in tune with their romantic side. Fortunately, most men can be taught, given the right attitude. Proceed carefully and don't ever pressure your man into romance. Here are some initial tips:
The golden rule is to lead by example.
Remember, you want your man to take the lead, but, on his terms, not yours. Start by pampering him. Do what he likes to do best -- even if that is drinking with the chums, playing a video game, or just watching TV on a Saturday night.
Doing this, a spicy ending to any of these activities will be much more favorable for him. Afterwards, show him you'd appreciate similar attention towards you, and eventually he'll get the bigger picture.
Take charge of a great night out with your man.
Plan an entire night on the town and then let your man just come along for the ride. Women need to appreciate just how difficult it can be for the man to always be the one to find creative and fun things to do.
It can be very romantic for the man when his lady takes charge in this way, finding a new restaurant and activity for them to enjoy. The man can find this very exciting and will be open to romance afterwards, once an enjoyable evening has been spent together.
Turn romance into a competitive game.
Alternate planning weekly date nights with your man and plan an activity that will appeal to his competitive nature. Men will often want to take the lead here because they find great pleasure in outdoing their mate.
Finally, make sure your man knows how much you appreciate the little things that he does for you.
This can be cooking a great meal when you are tired, opening the car door for you, treating you to a chocolate heart when you are feeling blue, any number of thoughtful, little things.
Make a point of mentioning that he does this for you in front of your friends and watch the envy of the other ladies ooze all over the place! Your man will take notice and feel loved! Romantic moments should quicken with this plan!
There are definite things that you can do to encourage your man’s romantic nature. All he may need is a little suggestion, knowing how much he is appreciated and a few well thought out challenges to get his creative juices flowing.
NURTURE ROMANTIC RITUALS
Couples are forever looking for ways to strengthen or enhance their love life.
A very simple and effective way to steal away for some quality time together is to establish a time to meet each day.
This can easily be arranged over the lunch hour and after dinner hours.
One idea is to arrange a time to meet for a drink of tea, or whatever type of drink that you prefer. If possible, arrange to meet in your home where you are assured of privacy.
With tea, enjoy a bite to eat when you can. While polishing off your pot of tea, simply sit for 30 minutes or so and discuss how your day is going and make any plans ahead for the coming week.
This can be a rather intimate time for the two of you and can become a regular ritual.
Many couples with children often want to know how they can add romance to their relationship being surrounded by children.
The regular meeting ritual is one way that couples can both spend some special time alone while setting a wonderful example for the children that their mom and dad really love each other.
For parents with small children, it might be impossible to spend quiet time alone together until after the children are put to bed. The importance of the ritual is the uninterrupted time spent together.
Whatever means you use to be able to do that consistently will pay off in the romance department, now and well into the future.
THE MANY EXPRESSIONS OF LOVE
Here are some things you can do to make the sparks of romance fly:
♥While your loved one is at work, use your spare key to open their car door and place roses and a card in their driver's seat. This will show your loved one your true feelings.
♥Don't buy your loved one a commercial type card to declare your love. Make them one and send it to them in the mail, even if you live together. The card will surprise your loved one!
♥Give your loved one a small decorated box. On the inside flap write "These are 50 of the many reasons why I love you." Create 50 brightly-colored folded strips of paper inside with various phrases...all declaring your love. Fill each strip of paper with something very personal and include some special surprises like a gift certificate to their favorite spa.
♥Spend the night outdoors together on a really warm, clear night. Name a star after him/her and register that name on-line.
♥Cook the love of your life what will be a favorite meal. Use candles, a bottle of red or white wine, then follow this up with a back and neck massage. Do this “just because” and ask for nothing in return. For message oils use sandalwood, lavender or ylang ylang. The art is to please your loved one. Watch the night just sizzle!
♥Send your loved one on a scavenger hunt. Have him find his goodies (prepaid and waiting) at the bakery, deli, wine store etc., and when he gets home meet him at the door in something very sheer. Feed him blindfolded and then hand him a Polaroid camera and tell him to have a ball!
♥Have a “conversation a day” (on the phone or at home) where you whisper to the other person and let them know you love them and miss them. Your whisper will capture their attention.
♥Run your love a bath, adding oil and bubbles. Fill the bathroom and bedroom with tea candles everywhere. Bathe your partner very slowly and massage the water and oil into their skin very gently. Tease them with kisses. Finish by presenting a warmed, fluffy bath towel and give a long kiss while drying them off. Complete your love ritual by rubbing your partner down with a sensual lotion.
♥Leave a trail of Hershey's Kisses with the pieces of paper that say "KISSES" taken out and replaced with your own romantic quotes. Make this trail lead to the shower to find roses and a note that says, "Now that I have kissed the ground you walk on and showered you with roses................You fill in the blanks!
♥Draw little hearts all over some post it notes and place them in your loved one’s lunch box, place on the bathroom mirror, etc. Just use your imagination.
♥Line a delicate trail of rose petals to lead to your bed and place one sweet love letter on top of a mound of the scented rose petals. Your loved one will melt!
♥Leave a single pink rose on your loved one’s pillow for the next morning....
♥Sing a love song in the shower and be sure to use your loved one’s name.
♥Wear your loved one’s cologne or perfume for the day. This will forever remind you of them.
♥Wrap a small mirror in a delicately laced piece of fine cloth and beautiful ribbon, then present this to your lover. Tell them, "I want you to know that this is what I treasure most in my life..."
♥Present your loved one with a small locket with a picture of you both, each on one side. Use a long silken cord or ribbon instead of a chain.
♥Give him or her flowers on each of your children's birthdays.
♥A thoughtful heart is a romantic heart!♥
NEW HOPE FOR A TIRED RELATIONSHIP
We are all familiar with the phrase, “love springs eternal,” BUT, just how does one bring this phrase to life in a relationship that is slowly disappearing?
When we are engaged in a solid, loving relationship, the stars shine brighter, the moon glows bigger and everything else in life seems to just fall into place.
This is ideal, of course! The reality is that our love life often needs extra care and attention, even at the best of times.
The good news is there are effective love life enhancing tips and hints available to those who need new insights and creative ideas to even jump start a love life that has fallen off-course.
It becomes a pretty tall order to have the creative love juices surging deep within all of the time. Saying, “I love you,” can be simple enough, but, showing how much you love him or her is something entirely different.
When your Love Life Slides off the Track
How often have you heard the statement, “The passion is gone?” Perhaps you feel you are more like roommates, than lovers. Once the excitement in a loving relationship goes out the door, so can the passion.
Once you have experienced distance in your relationship, and affection starts to wane, you can feel great sadness. When you begin to lose all the important things that seemed to matter when you first met, it can be difficult to begin again.
You can breathe new life into your love life! It is time to pour new energy into showing your partner just how much they mean to you.
Even Before you Begin....
**Resolve to never give up! Have a plan and then see it through right until the very end. A good relationship is worth every minute of your efforts!
**If you are feeling you are the only one doing all of the work in this relationship and you just want out, think again! Your interpretation of your relationship will color how you act next.
You need to be positive to move forward. Don’t make a rash decision while in the heat of the moment. Take some time to cool off, to re-group and then to remain committed. You are going to learn how to enhance your love life!
**Forget about the idea of making another relationship work when the one you are in now needs work. If you are not willing to do the work needed in your current relationship, remember that a new relationship will be even more difficult to work through.
We carry the baggage from our unresolved relationships right into the new ones!
**Think that the upset you feel now will bring about the wisdom necessary to grow in your relationship, despite the situation. You will be stimulated to face what comes next. Enhancing your love life takes work!
**Fixing a relationship that involves two, takes two. You must both agree to this, otherwise, the relationship will end when one partner refuses to do the work.
**Once the decision to move forward is clear by both parties, enhancing your love life will take both partners working together, making new promises and beginning with a first step.
**There needs to be action now. You both want to be making new choices such as changing your thinking, engaging in new behavioral patterns and changing your relationship from one that is just so-so into one filled with love and promise.
**Remember -- it is much wiser to learn to remake the future than to continue to relive the past. Tell yourself this truth, over and over.
Practical Tips to Enhance your Love Life
**Rebuild your love life - Work on yourself first. The relationship will follow. Two broken people cannot fix each other. Do something loving for yourself today, and then come back and do something loving for your partner.
**Be honest with yourself - Only you can do the work that you alone need. Learning to love yourself first teaches you how to love others. Learn to love you. Only then will you have the kind of love your partner needs. Only then.
**Begin all over again - Begin with a fresh start. Remember when you first met and everything was great? Each of you seemed to know what to do. The relationship was everything you wanted, right? Become re-acquainted. Get to know each other all over again. Begin by wooing each other like you did back then. Think a minute on those special moments. Think about those moments again.
**Resolve now to recreate those good times. You can begin your fresh start in your love life any moment you choose. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. It's time to move forward and without regrets.
**Establish a love life enhancement goal - What is your relationship goal? What is most important to you and to your partner? Spend quality time together talking about what is important to both of you. Set some love life goals. Write them all down on paper. Setting goals will allow you both to control the direction of change you wish for. To follow a new path without knowing where it leads is like walking into a maze.
**Develop a love life sense of humor - Laugh about anything or nothing at all for 1 minute of each day. Show your loved one your lighter side. Smile and then smile again. It's very catching. Cultivate the positive by only looking at the bright side of things for a change.
**Claim your bliss - Be happy now! It's your choice. Live and love to your absolute fullest and watch as the sparks start to fly.
**Cultivate togetherness - Plan to spend time together. The key now is to "plan." Stand by what you plan. Keep your commitments to be only with your partner. Work on this together and you will accomplish much more.
**Cultivate calm - Don’t let disagreements spoil your love life. Freely offer words such as, "I'm sorry," when needed and then put it behind you. Don't waste valuable time nursing a quarrel. Someone has to be first to back down -- might as well be you. Your love life will not thrive in an atmosphere of discord.
**Don't allow negative behavior to rule your love life - When the relationship is strained, it can sink very quickly. Sometimes you don't do what your partner wants you to do, so he/she becomes upset and even distant. Agree to allow each other to make your own choices. Remember, women will respond quickest to a man's action or lack of action. Men will respond quickest to a woman's attitude.
**Take good care of yourself. When you feel tension present in your love life it is easy to reach for inappropriate food, alcohol or drugs. This is a big mistake. Resolve to pamper yourself. A healthy mind and body will translate into a healthy love life.
**Sleep until rested. You can’t make up for lost sleep. When you are well rested you are loving yourself and then you have more to offer your loved one.
**Give genuine gifts! - Take the time to pay sincere gifts of love. Offer genuine compliments often. Offer generous praise for your partner. The road to prosperity in your love life will be paved with a commitment to generosity towards your partner.
**Feel close to your partner. We feel closest to those who cause us to feel good about ourselves. Lavish expressions of love on your partner. Bring them straight from the heart.
**Show appreciation. Nurture your love life with warmth and goodwill. This inspires your partner to want to please you. Appreciation is among the top ten needs for most people.
**Exercise better choices - This is a great gift. It requires that you do not repeat the bad choices you have made in your love life that have brought you to this point in time. You will get what you focus on. Look for and see the goodness in your partner. This will spur you on to even better choices.
**Show affection! - There is great healing in your power of touch. Hold hands. Kiss in your car. Give your partner a massage. Spend time holding and caressing. Give your partner an extended hug every day; one that lasts several minutes. Purpose to touch each other every day.
**Celebrate your love life! - Plan for special days in romantic ways. Make a note of very special days. The ones that belong just to the two of you; your first date, when you first made love, when you moved into your home, the day you got married, the day of the proposal. Plan something really special.
**Fun, fun, fun! - Kick your heels up and play like a kid again. Tell your partner you want to enjoy what he or she enjoys and then spend the entire day together. Make a commitment to do this regularly.
**Dress up and go out on the town. - Go on a date and dress to the nines! Make it a special night; even rent a tuxedo or buy a new dress. Make advance reservations for a classy restaurant. Delight in all the planning.
**Expect the unexpected. Be spontaneous and suggest something completely out of character. Send an intimate greeting card for no reason. Suddenly stop beside a country road, breath in the fresh air and say, "I love you!" and then be on your way. If your partner loves sports on TV, sit alongside and watch the game, too. Let your imagination have free reign.
**Who said life had to be so serious? There will be faux pas and rock and roll! So what? Better to just roll with the punches. Poke fun at yourself, it is very refreshing, but, not at your partner. That's their own job. Smile all the time.
**Take on “the art of communicating.” An entire book could be written on this subject! Your communication is the most important aspect of your love life. Without it, you are only half a person. We communicate in all kinds of ways, including verbal and non-verbal.
Just be very open to your partner and listen. Listening is the key to communicating. When you are communicating well you feel connected. When you feel disconnected you become distant. Your love life cannot survive being distant.
**Watch what you say. Choose the words you speak with great care. Words hastily offered are not easily retrieved. They become your reality. Your love life lives on the tip of your tongue.
**Make an effort each day to tell your partner how much they mean to you and how much they are appreciated. Talk with tenderness. Use terms of endearment, such as "Honey," "Sweetie," "Baby," etc. and be polite, saying "thank you." Whisper even the simplest of words that reflect your love and your relationship will grow.
**Nurture your love life with words of affection, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness. Nurture is to nourish, educate, grow or develop; cultivate.
**Cultivate a healthy love life. Healthy couples can identify problems with confidence. They can talk openly and honestly about their differences and come to workable solutions. Work on this actively, or the relationship will evaporate.
**Trusting and Being Trusted. Be a straight shooter. Trust is the great equalizer in a good relationship; without it there is no good! A good foundation in a healthy love relationship is built on trust and trust must be earned.
Holding back on the truth about how you feel, only telling part of the story, fudging on what your wants and needs are to your partner slowly erodes the trust in your relationship. Total honesty brings about awesome trust. Do all that you can to achieve it!
**Go the extra mile. Motivate each other to be the best you can be. Be inventive in coming up with ways to inspire your love life. Never stop. NEVER! Push the romance envelope with a getaway in the mountains for a long weekend. Splurge and go all out! Use your imagination.
**Agree to Agree. It is important to understand that relationships seldom feel easy; however, a relationship is less of a struggle when two people agree to do whatever it takes to make it workable. This does not mean "giving it your best shot and if it doesn't work, you move on." This means doing whatever it takes!
**Memories last a lifetime - So can your love life. Create a love scrapbook. Stash your memories of special greeting cards, matchbook covers that remind you of great visits, snapshots, a pressed flower, ticket stubs, a handwritten love poem, a funny, thoughtful valentine.
Celebrate spending time together living out a life’s dream. If you have always wanted to see Whitney Houston in concert, go! Save the concert tickets and program and frame them as a life long memory the two of you have shared.
**Spread a little sunshine. Give each other permission to their own space. Nothing grows well in the shade! If you are forever in your loved one’s pocket, you can stifle the love so freely given. Even love partners need time alone. You need space. This is another way to love yourself, first.
**Call the love doctor. A lack in your love life is nearly always a symptom of something that needs fixing in the relationship. Work on being more attentive, thoughtful and creative in expression of your love and your love life with come alive again.
**Go on a date with your partner. Even relationships that are old-hat need new juice! Once every week plan to spend some quality date time together. Enlist a trusted friend to stay the night with your kids and head for the “ten buck a night motel.” Relive those olden days when you really lit the fire.
**Practice volume control when talking. A quiet loving voice is respectful and will get you more of what you want, more often.
**Push your partner’s hot buttons - Push them spontaneously. I'm not talking about the ones you shouldn’t push. Push the turn-on buttons. Know what delights and pleases your partner and push those buttons often.
Pay special attention to do this. Often a warm and tender hug, a kiss on the back of the neck or an unexpected massage is all it takes to get those home fires burning again.
~~Remember that your love life is something that needs to be worked on all the time and not only when it is broken and needs to be fixed.
**Practice Prevention - Don't allow your relationship to slide into oblivion. Look at your love life as an active, breathing thing. Life needs to be refueled and taken care of. Look at the many ways you can actively prevent your love life from sizzling out.
**Learn to love more, smarter. You can acquire a healthier and stronger love life when you are learning more about what makes them so. Visit quality relationship sites on the Internet. Develop a desire to read. Join a book club and read together. Subscribe to relationship ezines. Attend relationship seminars. Get love life coaching. You can never be too smart about loving relationships.
**Priorities, priorities. Abandon the idea once and for all that your life is your work. Don’t confuse your career with your life. The same is true of your relationship! Relationship must always come first, then your career.
Put even a few of these love life enhancers into practice and a more healthy love relationship will be your reward.
Enhance your love life by being more affectionate
While your love is preparing the next meal go up behind him or her, and slide your arms around their waist. Nuzzle your face into the side of their neck and tell them how much you love them.
When walking past your loved one, brush by them with a quick touch. This could be a quick touch to the small of the back, shoulder or waist. Softly kiss your loved one on the cheek.
Snuggle your love while on the couch. Hold hands, caress her softly and kiss during commercials.
Hold your sweetheart's hand while driving in the car, or walking together.
Offer to brush her hair.
While having dinner together, touch hands often.
Enhance your love life by showing random acts
Showing random acts of affection liberally will put a smile on your loved one’s face. They will feel good, and that will cause you to feel good. Showing random acts of affection is all part of being thoughtful.
Show affection towards your partner for no reason and at completely spontaneous times. Why should showing your love by cuddling and kissing be limited to certain situations?
When you are showing random acts of affection to your partner they feel inspired to do the same thing!
Over time, your relationship needs an injection of new blood and showing random acts of affection guarantees your love life is active and well. You feel less like roommates and more like lovers.
* Hug your partner from behind next time they are brushing their teeth.
* Play slow music and treat your lover to a romantic dance.
* While your partner is busy around the home, walk by and stop to kiss him or her on the forehead.
* Offer a long, warm kiss to your love as soon as you walk in the door and just as you leave each day.
* Sneak up on your love and surprise them with a nuzzle in their hair or neck.
* Run your fingers through your love's hair as you wait in a line.
* Rub up against your love's leg while sitting beside him or her.
* Place your hand on the small of her back as often as possible.
* Caress your partner's face or arms during a heart-to-heart.
* Catch your love’s eye while they are reading the newspaper or otherwise engaged in concentration. When they look up and make eye contact back, smile and tell them how much you love them.
* When your lover dresses to go out, be sure to pay attention and direct your gaze to admire him or her with your eyes. Tell them how fabulous they look and seal it with a kiss.
ENHANCE YOUR LOVE LIFE IN THESE MANY SIMPLE WAYS....
Showing someone that you care and that they are special to you does not need to be complicated. Some of the most touching ways of saying I LOVE YOU are the simplest and most appreciated.
Adapt just a few today and watch as your love life takes wings.....and flies!
~Give or get a hug for no reason
~Tell the other person that they are important and respected
~Kiss them when people are looking
~Kiss them when people aren't looking
~Tell the other person that you care deeply
~Hold hands to show support
~Go together for a long bike ride
~Give a special present/give any present
~Tell them you are there for them when they need you most
~Spend quality time together every day
~Enjoy a film together and put your arm around him or her during the story
~Walk arm in arm through the woods
~Compose a special tape of love songs just for him or her
~Open up and share your feelings
~Open up and share your dreams with each other
~On a cold day snuggle up together/do this on any day just because
~Sit for a long while together in the park
~Take a long walk together
~Enjoy a meal together and you pay
~Enjoy a picnic indoors and roll around together on the floor
~Enjoy an outdoor game of Frisbee together
~Pay lots of lovely compliments
~Get all heated up and relax in a Jacuzzi
~Go for a hearty swim together
~Feel close together and just relax
~Shop for dinner together and you pay
~Cook a good meal together and you do the dishes
~Offer a loving touch
~Plan and go on a wild trip together
~Host a party for all of your mutual friends
~Bake a yummy cake
~Be quiet together in a library
~Cultivate your culture and browse in a museum
~Always be there for him or her
~Find out what's meaningful for the other person - and then join with them
~Get in good shape together
~Look deeply into his or her eyes and just gaze
~Wash your loved one’s car by hand
~Land that big fish together/you bait your own hook
~Talk to each other about everything
~Share each others concerns
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~Agree on a favorite mutual love song and then sing it to him or her
~Share in each others joys
~Hold on closely to one another whenever you can swing it
~Catch your loved one’s eye and hold it
~Write that special love poem/note/letter and send it to him or her
~Spend time talking on the telephone together when you are apart
~Tell your loved one you trust him or her
~Present your loved one with a ring
~Spend time together visiting family
~Spend time up in the mountains together
~Don’t be afraid to give up something important for him or her
~Send them their favorite chocolates often
~Give respect to each other
~Walk your hearts out to the light of the moon
~Give a sexy look to him or her
~Write your loved one a new poem
~Send your loved one exotic arrangements of flowers often
~Share your home cooked meal by candlelight
~Rock the night away at a concert together
~Watch as the sun starts to rise and think of your love of each other
~Remember your anniversaries
~Call each other by a pet name
~Spend your holidays together sightseeing
~Have a night in watching a funny video wrapped in a warm blanket
~Do those special things for each other without being asked
~Whisper sweet somethings into the other's ear
~Vow to be best friends while being lovers
~Make a date to have simple fun together
~Kick up your heals and go out dancing together
~Play your favorite classical music together
~Determine to flirt with each other each day
~Make a good joke to make him or her laugh each day
~Tell your loved one you will always be faithful and mean it
~Do something to impress each other
~Present your loved one with a list of the things you like about him or her
~Discuss the last book you read together
~Make a point to meet each other’s friends
~Enjoy a horse riding lesson together
~Alternate nights and then cook each other's favorite food
~Vow to do whatever it is that makes each other happiest
~Create a new present for each other from your own hands
~Offer to wash each other's hair
~Enjoy watching the sunset together
~Take a long bus trip and hold hands the entire time
~Phone in a request for him or her to be played on the radio
~Send your loved one a funny card
~Talk with your loved one about your plans for the future and include them
~Enjoy taking time to just play footsie
~Share a funny, private joke only the two of you can share
~When apart think of each other and what you will do when you meet
~Have your picture taken together and then once framed you each have one
If you were to do only a few of these suggestions each day, imagine how alive your love life would be!
HONOR YOUR LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
Engaging in a long-distance relationship is very challenging! To be up to it, take on the task of sending meaningful messages to your loved one on a regular basis.
Use the instant messengers like AOL, Yahoo, ICQ, etc. to keep your love life hopping, long distance. You have relative privacy and can reinforce the width and depth of your love this way. Try to IM each day and night!
Be really creative by writing a letter or finding a picture of something you have shared together. Paste the letter/picture to a piece of cardboard and then cut it into several puzzle pieces. Send your long distance love a few pieces every other day in the mail and once he or she has completed the puzzle send a dozen roses in celebration!
Have someone take pictures of yourself and create a handmade calendar. Use card paper and glue a colorful border on each piece. Color copy it and enlarge the pictures, pasting them on the paper. Print out boxes on the computer for the days and decorate each week or month. Tie them all together with a fancy ribbon and send it to him or her in the mail. Your loved one will not forget you!
Send your loved one letters sprayed with your perfume/cologne. Soak pieces of material with your scent and include those and it will last forever!
If you can’t be there to share a special moment, send your long distance love dinner by calling a restaurant where he/she lives and have them deliver your love's favorite meal. Use your computer cam to enjoy the meal together!
Instead of sending your love a hand-written letter this week, send a blank tape and microphone, and tell them your greatest desire for them when you next meet. They can listen to the tape whenever they want to hear your voice.
Send a package with a tape of the songs you listened to together the last time you were together. Send some of his or her favorite candy, and something memorable like a little stuffed toy. Tell them how much they are missed and how you think of them constantly! It's a great way to let your love know you're thinking about them despite the distance.
Surprise your loved one by arranging for a delivery of their favorite flowers! Attach a handwritten card professing your love for them! This is always a beautiful surprise!
Design a webpage in your love's honor. Dedicate the page to your relationship and include poetry, thoughts, pictures, romantic messages, the story of how you met, and all other details to make them smile.
Send your partner a virtual love card. Once you have their email address you are all set! Send them regularly!
Save a record of all of your email over your long-distance relationship. Once you have accumulated a full years worth, print them all out and separate them by month.
For every month, make a cover page that summarizes all of the important and sentimental things that you have done together. Include pictures taken, too. Have all of the pages bound into a hard-covered book, and give it a title, like "Love Abounds" inscribed on the cover. This will become a treasured keepsake!
CREATE A ROMANTIC NICKNAME
You can sure enhance your love life by adopting a nickname special only to your loved one! If you think that doing this is kind of wishy-washy, think again! A nickname mixes in some romantic spice into your love life.
A special name such as "Sweetheart" or "Cutie” can lighten up your loved one’s face and send a rush of sexy butterflies to their stomach! Why not try it and see for yourself?
Why bother with a nickname at all? Nicknames do the trick because:
* They pay a loving compliment when you pick the right one for your partner.
* They conjure up thoughts of love and romance.
* They make your loved one smile.
* A nickname picked out only for your partner will cause them to feel special.
* They are playful and set a fun mood.
Read from the list below and see if you can find a nickname that you would think fits your loved one’s personality and character. Try using it just once and then see how your loved one responds. If they like the nickname, adopt it as your own. The nickname is for your ears only!
Angel
Babe
Baby
Beauty
Beautiful
Buttercup
Cupcake
Cutie
Darling
Dear
Doll
Dumpling
Handsome
Hulk
Hun (short for Hunny)
Hunny
Hunny Bunn
Gorgeous
Kitten
Love
Lovely
Lulu
My Little Cutie
My Love
My Sweet boo
Brown Eyed Girl (or blue or green, etc.)
Peanut
Pookie
Princess
Pumpkin
Rosey
Sexy
Sex kitten
Sex muffin
Smiley
Sugar
Sunshine
Superman
Sweet Cheeks
Sweet Pea
Sweety
Sweetheart
Tarzan
Twinkle Toes
You get the idea! Try coming up with a few original nicknames of your own and then get to work -- time to start enhancing your love life with a new nickname to turn him or her on! Good luck!
CREATIVE PLANNING TO ENHANCE YOUR LOVE LIFE
Send your Loved one on a Scavenger Hunt
Send your loved one on a scavenger hunt to be remembered! He or she will visit places that are significant to your relationship, like where you first met, where you first kissed, your first date. You are waiting at each place ahead of him or her to give them the next clue. End the hunt somewhere romantic over a bottle of good wine.
Send your lover on a scavenger hunt throughout your home to find a gift. Start with a clue that will lead them to the kitchen, and then strategically place clues all over your home. Make yourself available for lots of kisses and hugs as they progress. For a playful touch place a gift of an edible oil for massage in the final box and prepare to have lots of romping fun!
Create clues to hunt for a gift according to special events the two of you have enjoyed. For example, "the place we first made love," "the place we last made love," "where we hide on the kids," "where we always kiss in the morning," Your partner will have fun remembering!
Plan & Prepare for a Romantic Meal
Romantic meals will work well any day of the week and aren't only good for Valentine's Day and anniversaries. The key is in the planning and preparation.
Make a Great Impression
Send a handwritten invitation to your loved one rather than inviting them over the phone. Include the date, time, location and any type of dress code. So that he or she is well prepared, forget about surprising them. You want them to be hungry to eat a fabulous dinner.
Choose your Meal
Your best bet is to simply ask. Ask him or her what their favorite foods are, if you don’t already know. No point serving them something known to be an aphrodisiac if you don’t know that they will like them.
Search the Internet for creative “love” recipes that includes your lover’s tastes. This is your way to their heart, after all! Preparing their favorite meal will be far more meaningful than simply selecting something interesting out of a cook book.
Fancy Schmanzy
Tell your loved one to dress fine! You should dress to knock their socks off, too! When you want to impress with a wonderful, love inspiring meal, be sure to dress the part, just the same. This will nicely set the mood.
If you like the idea of serving a dessert, it works well for you to prepare it earlier the same day. This way, you won’t be too busy with preparations once your guest is dining with you.
Check with your loved one to see if he or she prefers alcohol or not. You can buy very nice non-alcoholic wines to serve with dinner.
If your loved one offers to help with the preparations, take plenty of time to fool around! In between simmers and chops and dices, don’t forget to sample and nibble on the neck, as well! Setting the mood involves the romance department, too!
Set a Romantic Atmosphere
String very tiny and soft white lights along the fireplace, around a door frame or window frame. This will set a lovely, peaceful mood!
If your romantic dinner is set to take place while it is daytime and you prefer the dark, cover your windows so that no light will come in.
When featuring candles, consider using the non-scented types. This will highlight your savory aromas from your meal.
Mood music playing softly in the background will further enhance a romantic atmosphere. Plenty of really good radio stations found on the FM dial offer commercial free softer jazz and ambient sounds.
Set up your meal in front of a fireplace if possible. The last place you want to eat this romantic meal will be in your kitchen. If you have to, just this time, rearrange the furniture. It will pay off in spades!
Setting a Romantic Table
Use fabric napkins over paper. Be sure they are spic and span clean! For a romantic flair, use flower buds, dried or fresh and after rolling the napkin, attach the bud with a small piece of fancy ribbon.
Make this a “no interruptions night.” This means no phone, cell phone and most all, no pager.
Use a lace tablecloth and sprinkle it with gold and silver stars and moons for added flair. He or she will notice every last detail!
Fill a decorative flower vase with water and then place an assortment of colorful tea candles to float on top.
Hoping that your dinner will lead you to another room.......prepare it well with scented candles, flower blossoms sprinkled throughout and crisp and clean bed linens just ready to be jumped into!
Enhance your Love Life with Romantic Date Night Ideas
Spend one night out each week doing something fun and different. If you're looking for a few good ideas to start a weekly tradition with your loved one, read on!
Play a Fun Board Game
There are a bunch of really romantic and sensual board games for couples that you will find in most games shops. You could also go with traditional games and add a romantic twist to them. For Scrabble, say, adapt it by creating the rule that all words spelled must be on the topic of love and romance.
Cook a Weekly Dish Together
You can alternate weeks. Try the Internet to find great recipes that can be printed out. Try the recipe together.
Movie Night in and out
This is the main stay of any romantic couple, so be sure to not neglect this one. So long as you are watching a good variety of interesting flicks, and cuddling up and smooching as you watch the movie together, you are doing just fine! Plan for some yummy snacks!
Check out to see if there is a drive-in movie theater within driving distance and if there is, go out often!
Spend a Romantic Evening in
Order in something delectable like Mexican, pamper yourselves in a steamy bath together complete with bubbles and candles, take turns massaging each other with scented body oils and of course, make delirious love. If you are not doing this on a regular basis -- why not?
Go House Browsing
The women especially will love this! Take a casual drive, or walk in a neighborhood you consider ideal and dream a little. Together, pick out your favorite dream house. On the weekends you might take this one step further and visit open houses. Just be sure to set the ground rules first, (i.e. this would be my fondest dream with you....)
Go Extravagant with a Night out On the Town
Every good love life needs a little of this.Catch an independent film or attend a street fair, kick up your heals at a square dance, or sit in on a new book reading.
Gaze on a Star and Name it
Go out for a country ride and lay down a warm blanket. Gaze up into the sky and search for a star! Go on-line and register your name for your star and dedicate it to your relationship!
Learn Something Fascinating Together
Take a new class together, such as: Cajun cooking, Chinese brush painting or Early American Folk pottery.
Enjoy a Visit to a Museum
Museums are not all stuffy. Look for new experiences such as a wax museum, cultural digs museum, ancient artifacts museum, war memorabilia museum or any other type that might interest you both.
Enjoy More Fun Together
Go fishing, play snooker, try a new sport like volleyball.
Visit New Sights within your City
Contact your visitor’s bureau and look through pamphlets for new ideas on different aspects of your city that you can visit together. Make a list of “must-see’s” and then tick them off one by one. Keep a scrapbook of your many adventures.
JUST FOR SUMMER....ENHANCE YOUR LOVE LIFE
Enjoying the four seasons is a special treat for those in love. Summer seems to bring out the lover in all of us. Use some of these creative suggestions and enhance your love life in style!
Build a Huge Bonfire
Sleep Entirely Under the Stars
This means no covering of any kind.
Go for a Long Canoe Paddle
Wear your life jacket! Camp grounds will rent them out. Exploring is lots of fun!
Go for a Paddle Boat Ride
Wear a life jacket! Camp grounds will rent them out.
Feast with a Barbecue
Have fun with your friends or savor a private barbecue just for two.
Spend a Day with your Camera and Take Pictures
Pose with little animals and nature in the woods, or go to a park and take pictures of each other.
Reach for the Stars and Fly a Kite
Go for a Fun Clam Dig
Go for a Leisurely Walk on a Challenging Nature Trail
Spend the Day with a Picnic and Hike in the Woods
Go Fishing and Land the Big One
Go to a Private Nude Beach for the Day
Go on a Camping Trip
Make Homemade Sorbet Together
Go Swimming at Night in a Pond or Creek
Go Strawberry/Blueberry/Apple Picking
Go to a Local Circus
Go for a Walk at Sundown
Go to a Park and Lie Down in the Tall Grass
Watch for a Shooting Star in August
Get up Extra Early and Watch as the Sun Rises Together
Plant a Garden with Love Together
Paint a Room Their Favorite Color
Use a Telescope and Just Stargaze on a Very Dark Night
THE ART OF WRITING A LOVE LETTER
Personal, handwritten love letters are an ideal way to express your feelings to someone. They are not difficult to create if you are true to your feelings and give it some careful thought. Write what moves you best, be sincere and you will be sure to bring a smile to your love's face.
Waxing Poetic
Anyone can just copy a favorite love poem and then send it off. What will touch their heart best is something of your own design. You can use the example of another poem, changing the words around to suit your expression.
You can take several different poems, in fact, and then take what you love most from each of them to create your own. This takes some practice, Try starting with just one sentence. Change the words around to reflect your own personal feelings and then go on from there.
Personalize a Blank Card
You can buy beautiful and artistic cards that have only an outside picture and a blank sheet inside for you to create your own prose. Take your time and write out a verse that you think will be meaningful to your loved one.
Practice first with a scrap piece of paper and then when you have it just perfect, carefully print or write it out in the inside of the card.
Leave Your Note where it will be found
It will be a nice surprise for your loved one to find your note, unexpected. Don’t hide it so well that he or she won’t find it! Leave it in a common place that you are sure he or she will go looking. When they find it they can enjoy it all alone.
Own your Prose
Make sure you get good credit for writing your loved one. Don’t think that if you mark your note “anonymous” that she will just know it is from you.
Give a Gift
Include a little something that can be inserted inside the card or letter. A small gift will make your love note extra meaningful.
The romantic act of expressing your love in writing is always a special gift to receive and this becomes a keepsake for a lifetime!
Place your Love Notes in Creative Places
Adding the element of surprise to your love note is always special to the receiver.
Here are some really creative suggestions about where you can leave your handwritten love note:
In their shoes
In their lunch bag everyday
Under their pillow
When they travel just insert one into their luggage
In their laptop bag at night to be discovered first thing in the morning at work
For the reader -- in their bookmarked page
On their car windshield/wipers
Use the Windows Paint program to write your love notes, and then save them on their computer as the 'wallpaper'
In their shirt pocket before they leave for work
On the edge of the Jacuzzi, hot tub or sauna
On the bathroom mirror in lipstick, or the steam of their shower
Using washable markers -- everywhere
Inside their class notebook on the page after the last page written on
On the driver’s seat of their car
In their sandwich, wrapped in plastic
Taped to the back window of the car
In their wallet
On their steering wheel
Planted throughout the bedroom to be found while getting ready for work
In their pants pockets
Dictated on their voicemail
In the mailbox
Pinned on a teddy bear before they leave for work
In their gym locker
Written in soap on the mirror
Buried in the sugar bowl...to enjoy with their coffee
OPENLY EXPRESS YOUR LOVE
By now we all realize that one of the most important things to remember in a committed relationship is to keep the romance alive and thriving.
It is all too easy to take one another for granted after a period of time passes. Doing this, though, will not produce a strong love life and is not conducive for ongoing passion.
Easily the most effective way of keeping your relationship fresh and filled with love and appreciation is to simply nurture romance.
Here is a helpful meditation to keep your love alive!
I won’t ever take you
. . . for granted
I won’t ever forget
what it was like before you
or how I would feel without you
I won’t ever forget
our first kiss
our last warm touch
I won’t ever let a day go by
without telling you
how very much you mean to me
how very deeply I love you
how very much I need you
You need never doubt
the way I feel about you
how much happier I am
. . . with you in my life!
I love you now and always!
Wouldn’t a wonderful declaration of your love be a nice and romantic gift?
DECLARE YOUR LOVE
I find the words difficult
with just so many emotions tumbling through my mind
I feel only pride in you for who you are and what you mean to me
I struggle to put my thoughts to paper....but I must
You mean everything to me and more
even when the words don’t come out quite right
I still feel such peace and complete assurance
that you understand
I will forever be right by your side
I feel so whole when you are near
it all feels so good and so true
How can I thank you?
For the many dreams
for such wonderful times
Even if I should awake to be alone and scared
you are there
in my fondest hopes and memories
and when morning comes
together.....
we will still be on this journey
for we made a vow....
You make my life complete
You heal my heart and show me pure joy
You touch my soul and teach me to laugh
You heal my mind and teach me to dream
You kiss my spirit and teach me to fly
You are the best part of my life.
Probably the dearest and sweetest show of your affection would be to pen your own thoughts of your loved one. Why not get started now? You have so much to gain!
Use all the tips above often, and keep the flames of romance kindled in yours and your partner’s lives!